How to Work Through a Trigger
We all have ideas about what might cause feelings to arise, how doing or saying a certain thing might make someone feel — and we all project those ideas into other people constantly.
Hello, trigger and content warnings. 👋🙏
The reality is that anything could trigger anyone, anytime.
You yourself will be triggered by all sorts of things, and so will everyone around you.
You can’t control that, and you will lose yourself trying — so you may as well explore your reactions and responses instead.
Employ a trigger in the service of your inner work, and it becomes a gift.
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PRACTICE: Work Through a Trigger
1) Notice the trigger’s trigged.
(This takes time and practice — not noticing until the moment has passed is okay too.)
2) Stop. Interrupt your default reaction pattern by simply noticing you're in a pattern, in mind and body.
(This applies to the event itself, and your thought patterns about the event afterwards.)
3) Notice where you are physically, along with what you’re experiencing.
Feel your feet on the ground, notice objects around you. Feel your body, notice your mind. You’re here, you’re OK — you’re not dying in this moment. You are regulating your nervous system.
4) Feel through or pin your feelings as needed — you might have the time and energy to process your feelings in the moment, or the moment might not be appropriate. That’s okay – the aim here is to disentangle your SELF from your thought-feelings, soothe your body-mind, and more or less regain your centre. The processing of feelings is a separate issue (also important).
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The best way I know to accomplish the steps above IRL and IRT is through meditation and shadow work.
Meditation creates space and time between SELF and thoughts, helping you notice triggers and reactions as they arise.
Shadow work exposes core beliefs, fears and desires, causes you to examine the mental and emotional structures you’ve built to protect yourself.
Doing this work creates space for you to approach yourself with curiosity instead of judgment, and make positive shifts towards fulfillment in your life and relationships.
❤️
- S
